Worst Paragraph Ever!?

Not only do these three pieces have things in common, but they also have things that make them stand out from one another. For example, a visual feature that they didn’t have in common would be in Aaron Copland, Appalachian Spring, opening (1944), the man has a solo, but in the other videos, they don’t have a solo and they’re dancing in groups together. This in my opinion shows emotion and how women aren’t the only ones who are able to express their selves freely. Men are often shy when it comes to expressing their true feelings because they feel as if its not masculine enough. But in this piece, the man does his solo, expressing the way he feels. A visual feature that also stood out among the rest of the pieces was In Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, The Sleeping Beauty, Act III Pas de deux (1890), every single one of the dancers are wearing white. The color white itself usually refers to goodness, pureness etc. Throughout the entire piece, the male and female dancers were dancing in harmony and unity. They were in flow together and as a viewer, I felt their connection on a spiritual level. I was able to feel what it would feel like to be in their shoes. Dancing closely to one another in rhythm, feeling each other and just going through the motions overall. One more visual feature that all three pieces had differently was their settings. Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, The Sleeping Beauty, Act III Pas de deux (1890) had a setting which seemed to be in a royal ballroom, which seems to be very exquisite and elegant. Igor Stravinsky, Rite of Spring, opening (1913) seems to be in the mountains but in the dance, it seems as if they are dancing their selves to death while Aaron Copland, Appalachian Spring, opening (1944) took set in a traditional house setting, which shows how everything in life was established from husband and wife, to settling in a house with a family. Setting is very important because it sets the mood. You see a movie start off in a battlefield and you’ll notice how everybody is miserable and people are crying. Or if a movie starts off around nature, you’ll notice how it’s more peaceful and relaxing. Setting is key and helps the viewer or reader expand on the main idea.

-Raphael Irizarry

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6 comments

  1. Not so bad! You have a good point about the man solo in Appalachian Spring, and you have your own opinion and feelings when you watch this ballet. I agree with you The Sleeping Beauty ballet is very elegant; Rite of Spring ballet “in the dance, it seens as if they are dancing their selves to death” if you write more details to provide your points that will be great, for example, dancers’ movement, gesture. Also, make this big paragraph to 3 small paragraphs and each piece of ballet for one paragraph because it is easier to read.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I noticed a few spelling errors but I liked that you mentioned your opinion in the paragraph and even brief symbolism about the costumes the dancers wore. You thought about way more than just the dance itself.

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  2. Gives a lot of god detail and tries to explain to the viewer using something other than the topic and use something the viewer can relate too try and help the reader or viewer understand . You let them know that its your opinion and you show why your right .

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  3. It is not the worst paragraph ever. I like the fact that you’ve explained and detailed your opinion on the Ballets. There are some Gramatical and punctuational errors. You could have also reworded some of your statements. Overall it’s a decent paragraph.

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  4. I like that you start off. Not only did you transition well from your previous paragraph, but you also introduced what this paragraph would be about. Well done. One gripe I had was that, although you did tell us that the paragraph would be about each piece’s unique attribute, you kept saying like “blah blah thye didnt have in common”, or “stood out among the rest” when switching to the next piece to analysis.
    Another gripe is that you completely changed topics towards the end of the paragraph talking about setting, when at the beginning I thought as a reader we were going to be exploring what made each piece unique.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This is actually not the worst paragraph ever, you had a couple of grammatical errors but, you used a lot of details and you were able to analyze each of the music pieces without having such a vague description.

    Liked by 1 person

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